Dear Miss Molly

Dear Miss Molly,
I have but one question to ask. What have I done to deserve this? I went out this morning to let the boys do their business only to discover that you have helped yourself to 8 feet of planter boxes worth of blooming pansies and a pot full of petunias that were on the deck. You can not know how much you have hurt me.

I have not complained to you (maybe on my blog, but never to you) when you ate the branches of my baby Honey Crisp Apple tree, demolished the last half of the Yellow Twig Dogwood bush, or stripped all the green plums off the plum tree up as high as I can reach without a ladder. Not even when you stabbed me in the heart by eating my beautiful Star Gazer Lilies just at the peak of beauty have I abused you in return.

All month long you have been provided not only with vitamin stuffed exotic vegetable goodness from my landscaping, but I have provided you fresh, cold, clear pure water from the Rathdrum Prairie too. Even when you stepped on the sprinkler in the front yard and broke it I did not take the water from you. No, instead, sweet hubby replaced it so you could continue to have your much needed beverage.

When you decided you would use our luscious soft green lawn for your bed at night, I have not abused you. Quite the contrary, I have gone to great lengths to make sure your sleep is not disturbed. Even going as far as to put the dogs on a leash and drag them to the other side of the house for their business so you can get your beauty sleep in peace.

Wasn't it me who rescued you when Tommy managed to escape the house and attempted to bite your heals? Did I not scream at him until I was hoarse to get him back in so you would not suffer from his tiny little teeth? Sure, I chased you away afterward, but it was for your good. I did not want your ears to suffer damage from the high decibel barking coming from Tommy's mouth or be injured from possible flying glass as he flung himself against the living room window. He may be small, but I did not know the strength of those windows.

So tell me, Miss Molly, why would you eat the pansies and petunias on the deck? Why would you hurt me like that? You know how much work I put into those planter boxes to make them bloom beautifully. Have I not provided you with enough? Is your tummy not fat enough, and your coat not sleek and shiny enough?

I think you should know that I talked to the Idaho Fish and Game department over the weekend. They are going to contact the hunters who have won Moose tags for our section (2) and give them my phone number. After the shock of finding all of the pansies and petunias gone this morning, I think you'll be getting what you deserve.

Sincerely,
Your host, the Parkarosa Moose Motel